I had this huge revelation last night and it was so amazing and with it came so much freedom. It’s the silliest thing ever, I tell ya…who’da thunk! I’m just so excited about moving forward and arriving at my Home.
For a long time I have been working through my past memories. These have drug me down for so long and some of the things I just recently recalled or were spurred on through conversations with family members. I won’t go into detail, I’m just not doing all that anymore. However, If you decide to delve further into reading this blog, then you will surely find several posts about the past.
In order to work through all this I had to start the process of Forgiveness, which was/is not easy, not one bit. I always thought it was but I will gladly admit I was WRONG! 🙂
Yesterday had been a particularly rough day for me, there’s no rhyme or reason to the WHY because I just don’t know. I might have been overtired and had a lack of sleep but that is neither here nor there. It was just before dark and my daughter walked through the room as she was leaving to go on her nightly walk around the apartment complex we live in. At that very moment, what I felt was like a slap in the face but it was SO GOOD! I just had this thought about letting go of the past, it’s an ongoing process so it’s something I have committed to doing for the rest of my days.
It was like this phenomenal thing, I realized that letting go of the past meant a lot more than just letting go of the EVENTS and ACTIONS of the past, “oh my goodness” I thought, it’s also about letting go of the fears, abandonment, rejection, self pity, re-gaining confidence in who I am (which is in the line up to write in a few days), but my goodness, I couldn’t believe it, I have all this stuff that’s been like a clogged drain in my life that’s been there forever but it never once occurred to me that the issues from all that needed to be let go of as well. I never connected the events to the issues that I still carried with me each day!
Even though I did feel rather silly for not realizing this sooner, I am SO Grateful for now realizing this and how I feel like I can really move forward, really truly Let Go and Let God do His will to a greater degree than what He is doing now. I’d really love to share this song with you too, so you all can enjoy it WITH Me.