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There is Always Hope

It’s never an ordinary day here. there’s always one thing or another going on.

Sometimes it can feel like I have a million things to do and no matter how I try, it doesn’t seem to get resolve when I want it or when I need it to be.

But I know there is always hope.

Even when you mess up, you have not wrestled control from Him.

After all the dust has settled, where you are and how you are is just as He set the course at the outset of creation.

Higher

Closer

You may not understand, you may not be able to see, but nothing can interfere with that plan. All must go higher and only higher each day.

And so, there is always hope.

The Lover of my Soul

The Lover of my Soul

He created me and cares for me, he tells me I’m without fault or blame, without blemish, even though I make mistakes, it’s okay, I won’t be punished for it. He tells me and shows me love and warmth and protection with each new day…

His name is Yeshua (Hebrew for Jesus)..and he sees my struggles and loves me through them all. He never gives up on me. I have made my decision…Yeshua is For me, not Against me. I want Him more than anything else.

You see…it’s the perfect love story and I live to tell of it. He loves me so I can love Him and no matter my struggles I can always live and reach out to others.

All the years I’ve spent thinking and disallowing myself to be whole; because I talked myself into believing, that my mistakes keep me from being whole.

In the meantime, negativity and self-pity found a stronghold in my mind. I’m closing my mind to those things, never to rest in me or on my tongue again.

I want to devote my life to Him like many others have and help others in the ways they have.

Blessings

unwritten and updates

We’ve now made the move to NC and are settled in and getting comfortable. The job that I wanted to transfer from was going to be too far to drive so I am interviewing and sending resumes out.

In the meanwhile, I’ve spent time discovering new things about myself and dealing with some old baggage. YHVH\God has provided in every situation that we have encountered rough waters. It’s quite an expense moving from state to state if your company or the military doesn’t pay for everything.

I’ve been listening to a song called Unwritten for a few weeks now and it pretty much says all my thoughts..yes, I feel very Unwritten and even though I know the Father has a plan for me, I believe I need to have a plan of Purpose for my life. The song and lyrics are here if you’d like to have a listen:

Unwritten

adjust your vision

Do you ever see something that looks like it’s strange or you think maybe you’ve not seen it before? Upon close inspection, however, you will notice that it’s quite normal and you’ve seen it hundreds of times before.

While cleaning the washroom one afternoon I spotted a lady’s face, it was in the vinyl above the bathtub. While I had never seen it before after living there for over 5 years, now I suddenly started seeing it and I could Not see it, even if I tried. I always find that humorous.

I woke up this morning thinking, I’ve never known who I am, not in my entire life.

Lately, things are becoming so clear to me, so clear in fact, that it’s hard to differentiate between whether I’m seeing through a glass or seeing the natural.

I’ve always believed in seeing the good in others; actually, it’s not as much an intended thought as it is a way of life for me. I just never saw that people are ‘inherently evil’, now I know that’s what the Bible tells us in Psalms 51: 5 – “In evil, I was formed in the womb and in sin, my mother conceived me.”

A few days later I saw the Torah Portion for this week and I’ll share it here…amazing how so many thoughts I have seem to be shared by others at the same time.

Seeing With Spiritual Eyes

this essence…

“The key to Greatness lies not in our ability to Project ourselves to others.  It’s not as if we are putting ourselves onto a projector and creating an Image of ourselves on a screen. Rather, our key to Greatness lies in who we Are. When we can Give to other people, it is in such a way that when they walk Away from us, they are able to say in their hearts that they have taken Away something With them that is quite Extraordinary.”

This is what I call the Essence. What I believe about the essence, is that it comes from having the Holy Spirit alive in you, working in you, this spiritual essence is left in the minds of those who associate with you, no matter the capacity. People will remember what being around you felt like, they can describe it without hesitation for a long time afterwards. You will remember it too, when it happens to you.  How? it’s one of those things that your soul hangs onto, it lingers in your memory until you experience another time.

The first time I felt this essence I was 3 years old, this is also one of the very few memories that I have retained all of my life. I used to wake up every night and sit on the couch, I believe I was talking with God. I can clearly remember that time in my life and I remember so well sitting there on that couch and talking in a whisper with Him. There are many other times as well, but I won’t get into detail about those.

It’s like the wisp of a bird flying past or the flit of the wind, that you cannot see anywhere around you. It’s warm and gentle and the feeling can be ravenous, one day it might have slipped your mind and something will happen and there again, it comes like a soft, warm touch upon your shoulder or your hair or it might be a glance in a stranger’s eye.

Like-Minded People

Sitting in the room with all the like-minded, broken, bruised, torn apart people just like me. Set Apart.

What are those words?

Why those words?

Yeshua bled is why and He’s why our unique creation exists; all individual, flawlessly created, not one being like the other.

Identical twins aren’t even the exact same.

Why did He chose me to be there.

He put me there against all the odds that were impaling me.

I have these voices in my head (negative thoughts), they’ve been there for so many years beckoning me to hear their music, to follow every note and keep in tune. And I did, because I knew no differently.

I could barely think of a time when the whispers were louder than this calling out of who I thought was me.

The darkened days, the gloom, the sorrow, that infinite dark cloud shadowing over me with each step I take, each breath.

Every chance there was, so was the darkness.

Ephesians 6:12 “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

This verse goes through my mind many times. some days, sometimes only once is all I need.

Loving Yourself

You cannot hate your way into loving yourself.

Telling yourself what a failure you are won’t make you any more successful.
Telling yourself that you’re not living up to your full potential won’t help you reach a higher potential.
Telling yourself you’re worthless and unlovable won’t make you feel any more worthy or lovable.

I know it sounds almost annoyingly simple, but the only way to achieve self-love is to love yourself—regardless of who others think you are and where you stand and even if you know you want to change.

You are enough just as you are. The Hebrew word that helps me is Dayenu and it means, It is enough, so it is enough that you someone that the Father made.

Woman of Courage

I found this on a facebook timeline and wanted to share:

I believe that we have to continue to speak things to ourselves and trust in them.. Declare them over all those doubts..
You are what you believe you are.

Tell yourself..

I am courageous..
I am determined..
I am unstoppable..
I am victorious..
I am love..
I am gifted..
I am anointed..
I am blessed..
I am successful..
I am healed..
I am beautiful..
I am whole..
I am confident..
I am forgiving..
I am grateful..
I am generous..
I am strengthened..
I am well-able..
I am favored..
I am God’s masterpiece..
I am not who I was.. I am who I am becoming..
Less of me.. More of Him..

Keep speaking life to yourself..
and don’t just say it..
Trust in it..

Captivate Us

Your face is beautiful
And Your eyes are like the stars
Your gentle hands have healing
There, inside the scars
Your loving arms they draw me near
And Your smile it brings me peace
Draw me closer, oh my Yeshua
Draw me closer, LORD to Thee

Captivate us, Yeshua
Set our eyes on You
Devastate us with Your presence
Falling down
And rushing river, draw us nearer
Holy fountain consume us with You
Captivate us Yeshua, in You

Your voice is powerful
And Your words are radiant bright
In Your breath and shadow
I will come close and abide
You whisper love and life divine
And Your fellowship is free
Draw me closer O my LORD
Draw me closer LORD to Thee
Let everything be lost in the shadows
Of the light of Your face
Let every chain be broken from me
As I’m bound in Your grace
For Your yoke is easy, Your burden is light
You’re full of wisdom, power and might
And every eye will see You…